Caring for Animals/Caring for Self

We have a few animals around our home. Two birds, a cat, two dogs and several wild birds that we feed through the winter. We used to also have two guinea pigs and several fish. That got to be just too much work. When one begins to resent the work involved more than one enjoys the relationship with the animal, it is time to find them a new home.

The same could be said for relationships. Yes, all relationships take some work and care. But there are some relationships that require much more high maintainence than others. These ones tend to drain the heck out of our energy. We find ourselves twisting into pretzels trying to make something work, anything work, within this kind of relationship and still end up exhausted on a deep soul level. If something or someone doesn't feed your soul, then it is far better to not have it and look for something or someone who does. I have never yet met a person who has made that hard decision and regretted it later.

I find caring for animals generally fulfilling. The relationship between a human and an animal can be extremely magical. For example, it is rare that I don't pick up on my dogs' thoughts that they would like to go outside for awhile. It is also rare that I can't pick up on where the cat is. We have a bit of a telepathic connect. I remember dreaming one night that my dog had her chin on my bed and when I opened my eyes I saw her lips move as she mouthed the words,"I need to go outside and pee right NOW." Suddenly I really did open my eyes and there she was with her chin on my bed. I whispered,"Do you need out?" and she bolted for the door with such speed I knew I'd better be hot on her tail before she lost control of her bladder.

It is man's (by that I mean all human beings for those who are anally politically correct) job to care for the earth. That includes the earth's creatures. This is why we feed the birds outside as well as feed our own animal family. If we didn't do this, they could certainly die in our -48 C weather. As it is, some probably will die. The wheel turns. But if we can help in any way, we certainly will. I was very pleased this summer to find a few deer also utilizing our land as a grazing zone. The only challenge was allowing that while keeping our dogs away from them. The relationship between dog and deer is what it is. The dogs chase and the deer run. Hopefully the deer come back and the dogs get used to their presence in the pasture as much as they did the presence of the horses a few years ago.

I find that caring for the animals, domestic and wild, to be something that connects me on a deeper level with nature. Learning their language is important as well. I have learned to mimic the sounds of each of my pets. I figure if I expect them to understand my language then I had better learn to speak theirs as well. What I am saying could be completely stupid in translation, but at least I am attempting the process. That is all we can do really. If we give it some effort, there is bound to be some good results.

Blessed Be

Trent

The Masculine Revolution

Seems to me we need a Masculine Revolution. The only trouble with that is that men as a group don't tend to get organized and network as well as do women when it comes to revolutions. If the revolution has something to do with war and kicking serious butt, then yes, men are all over that. But when it comes to an actual revolution of consciousness, then men tend to preoccupy themselves with the football game and such. I'm a man. I know these things. I have been there and done that, and quite frankly, it got very boring very quickly.

So what the heck do I mean by a Masculine Revolution? Well, we are finding as men that our roles in society are changing radically and rapidly. Our roles as fathers are now not just "providers" and emotionally absent "kings of the castle", but are nurturers and caregivers. We now do things like clean bathrooms. We do these things because they need to be done, not because our wives and live in partners have nagged us to do them. We are becoming more conscious of how bloody hard our mothers worked themselves into the ground while our fathers ignored it and preoccupied themselves with the football game. Don't get me wrong, I love football. But there is a time and a place for everything. So now we no longer "help out" around the house and "babysit" our own kids. I hate it when I am with my children and someone says to me,"So you are babysitting today?" ARRRRGH!!!! I am caring for my children! I am their FATHER! That is what fathers do now days, so get on the same page and know that there is nothing (NOTHING) more important to me than my children. If I were a babysitter, I would get paid to do this stuff. Instead, I am investing my time and energy into being there for my children so that they know what a strong and gentle male is and will hopefully partner up with another strong and gentle male and not just some beer swigging redneck bloke!

In my vision of a Masculine Revolution we change from the inside and thus ripple that change to the outside world. We don't have to take up arms to perform this revolution. We do need to take up a new awareness of what it is to be male. We won't have anything to "prove" about being male. We will grow confidence and self-trust from within. We will have integrity and not be pushed about by society's expectations that we live up to some stereotype role of a male.

A true warrior is someone who will make 40,000 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for his children over the course of 12 years or until they know how to do it for themselves. For some children this learning curve comes way before 12. For some....well it may be a bit after that, but hopefully not much. A true warrior is present and accountable in his child's life, not absent and aloof. He is there to help his child to learn what it truly is to be a responsible person. That means taking the consequences as well as the praise. Learning how to personally grow is an important part of anyone's life. A true warrior teaches other warriors how to walk through life with love and peace and connection to the world around him. He teaches this to his sons and to his daughters. His sons will learn how to show respect to elders and to their wives and lovers. His daughters will be confident and capable of corporate work, or mothering (the most challenging job she will ever have) or both. There will be open hearts, full hearts, strong hearts and clear hearts involved in every interaction.

I will probably blog more on this, so do stay tuned. Just know that for now, the revolution is happening and it is silent in sound, but thunderous in effect.

Blessed Be

Trent

Castles and Self-care

There are certain things that castles need in order to function. The first thing is a good set of fortress walls. This helps keep out invaders who are full of malice. A castle also does well with a moat. This serves as an additional boundary before one even gets to the walls. If there is a moat, then there also needs to be a drawbridge, which can be lowered when guests are arriving and raised when danger is afoot, or when it is time to turn in for the night. Castles also need a warm hearth, a place to gather around the fire and connect with those near and dear to us. On the walls there is often a series of tapestries that bring color to the gray walls and also serve to keep out drafts. It is also important that a castle has a flag that is raised to indicate such things as when the occupants are home, when someone has died, when there is distress and so on.

As individuals, we also need proper walls. These walls are not just to keep everyone out, but to protect us from those with malice in their hearts. In shamanic terms this would be known as a Medicine Shield. We need distinct emotions that are displayed (emotions are the water element...the moat) at appropriate moments and let others know where we are and if we are approachable. We also need to be able to bridge across our emotions and connect with others when we would like to invite them into our sacred space. At the same time, we need the awareness within to know when it is time to draw up the bridge. The hearth is similar to a warm heart. When we meet the world with a warm heart, we find that the world warms to us very well, for the most part. This allows us to connect with those in our lives who are most important, and to be friendly with others who are around us. The tapestries that we create with our lives weave us into the fabric of others' lives, and vise versa. The communication with others can, as a result, become colorful and beautiful in design. This communication with others also helps to keep us warm in their embrace, and they in ours. Now and then, we also need to pay attention to our "flags" of communication. We need to make sure that we send out the correct signals to others, and don't simply expect them to "know" what is going on inside the castle if we don't have the flags functioning. When we are in distress, we need to be able to communicate this clearly so that others can come and help. If we are available, then we also need to communicate this with the proper signals (or flags) so that others can respond by getting together with us for friendly connections.

In many ways, we as humans are like castles. If we take care of our castles they will keep us safe and warm for years and years. If we neglect them, they deteriorate and fall down. The same can be said of our bodies. And when we pay attention to our own inner signals, they also keep us safe for years. When we confuse the signals within ourselves, then we learn to mistrust them and set ourselves up for many a fall over the years.

So keep your castles in good running condition. Treat them well and enjoy sharing them with others who are worthy. Stay connected with the signals and pay attention to the signals in others as well.

Blessed Be

Trent

Free Expression vs. Good Impressions

What is a home? Is it a place where basically we just eat and occasionally sleep? Is it a place that is a sanctuary? Is it a place that we gather with friends? Is it all of these?

I heard an expression used the other day while watching "Yours, Mine and Ours", the new version. The character of Helen, played by Rene Russo, said that "A home is for free expression, not good impressions." This got me thinking. Back in my bachelor days I did the whole, "Couldn't give a flying %$!@^ what people think of my home, I will drop my cloths wherever they may fall and I will clean whenever I get around to it. This was a far cry from the "you can eat off my kitchen floor" days that were earlier on. It was, shall we say, slovenly. But was it free expression, or just laziness and rebellion? I think it was more the latter than the former. Now that I am more of a minimalist that I ever was, my home is more filled with expression than ever, yet it is also simple in nature. This allows the energy to flow well throughout the space.

Now this is not to say that there are not designated disaster zones. My daughter just cleaned up the family room in the basement after 2 weeks of hardly being able to walk from the steps to the computer without stumbling over playmobile villages and creatively designed castles. Now THAT is free expression. But after awhile, even this gets a bit much. I figure if I have to start digging my way to the computer to do my blogging, then something's gotta give. She was very sweet about it. She waited till I was outside snowblowing for 4 hours today and then had at it, not just cleaning up the playmobile metro center (which by now it had become), but also remaking the spare bed, categorizing the DVD's by rating (PG on the far left, then General, then old comedies etc) and designated an old pair of "granny" cushions that neither she nor her sister like to a chair that is going to their grandpa's place. This space looks FABULOUS! I asked her why she cleaned up the playmobile when she could have left it out to play and just cut a path to the computer and she said, "Oh, I'm done with that for now. I have other things I want to play with now."So the free expression room is now perfectly tidy. Mind you....I haven't yet looked in her bedroom!

Although I enjoy having people come into my home and comment on how lovely it is, this is not the main purpose of keeping it tidy. It is a place where my wife and I are able to kick back and relax. When we have a disaster zone in the middle of our living space, we both get on edge and things start going downhill fast. It is like the disaster zone is a magnet for other "disasters" to pop into our lives. So, having learned that we need peace and flow of energy, we do our best to keep it as tidy as we can without being too anal about it. And we do this regardless of what others may think.

Blessed Be

Trent

The Wheel Turns

In almost every tradition there are Medicine Wheel teachings. Some of these teachings will vary from one tradition to the next, but each tradition is correct, each for their own valid reasons. So often I have had people complain about the fact that my medicine wheel is set up "incorrectly" in some way, shape or form. What they are really saying is that they have become rigid in their beliefs and think that their way is the only way.

The thing is that the Medicine Wheel teaches us that each way is valid. There are many paths up the same sacred mountain, and they all reach the top. If you were to look at sacred mountain from above the tip if it, you would find that its cone shape creates a medicine wheel and that the spokes out to the edges are many. Each spoke is a different path so that everyone on Mother Earth is able to find their way up the mountain.

My most recent configuration of the Medicine Wheel (there have been many according to what the wheel - a sentient being - communicates it needs) is that of a spiral. This has by far been the most powerful of all the configurations to date. Some folks who are medicine wheel "experts" don't even recognize the formation as a medicine wheel because, again, they have become rigid in their beliefs of what a medicine wheel should look like. It doesn't have to be a circle with 4 or 8 spokes. It can be a series of circles, spirals, geometric configurations and the like. They can resemble mandalas and crop circle formations. They can be as elaborate or as simple as each person can imagine. But they still are medicine wheels. They can be made of stone, of plants, of crystals, of wood, of any number of materials. And they will resonate with the "creator" of them. I put that word in quotation marks because the creator is the Creator, who is infusing us with the information of how to set one up, where and for what purposes. We become "inspired", or have spirit in us.

I mentioned that my wheel is a sentient being. Well, this is true. It talks to me and I listen. It gives me pictures and I see them. It gives me feelings through my body and I experience them. Basically it connects me in a vast array of ways, and for this I am always grateful. This is why I have agreed to be the caregiver of this wheel. Some day, perhaps someone else will be the caregiver of it. But for now, this is part of my job as a shaman. I am the keeper and caregiver of the wheel. And the wheel turns......

Blessed Be

Trent

Vibrational Transmitters

It has been said in many oral traditions that everything we think, say and do will ripple forth for the next seven generations. This also applies to those who don't happen to have children of their own. So how does this work, anyway?

We can understand this more easily when we wrap our minds around the fact that we are vibrational transmitters. Our thoughts, our actions and our words are energies that create a ripple in the pond of universal energies. Spirit then feels this and responds. As it responds, what we have sent out comes back to us, magnified several fold. This is also called "instant karma", which is totally a groovy thing because it means we don't even have to send out bad thoughts at the fool that cut us off in traffic, because that same fool will have some of that negative energy he just created bite him in the keester.

But the way it ripples so long and far (the 7 generations thing) is quite amazing. That is where generational karma comes into effect. What our ancestors sowed, we now reap. And we have to make sure that what we sow is something our future generations will appreciate reaping. After all, we are taking care of the earth for them, not for us. Yes, this also goes into the whole tree hugging thing. If we don't take care of the earth mother, then she won't be able to support us. We may not see that happen in our lifetime, but others will in theirs. This is why we need to respect her and care for her. The future generations are only loaning her to us for right now. It is much the same as an inheritance that is put into the care of a custodian until the child comes of age. It can be used to provide for the growing child, but it does not belong to the custodian.

So it becomes very important to watch not just what we say and do, but also what we think, because those thoughts will ripple out as well. And we want positive ripples to return. This does not mean that we don't slip up now and then. But when we do, we need to replace it with a much more positive vibrational thought. It also doesn't hurt to say "cancel that" to the negative one. Spirit will hear that as well. ;-)

Blessed Be

Trent

Respect and the Art of Forgiveness

This is a concept that has been popping up in my life a lot of late. I have had a number of relationships in which this has been an issue. What I have learned by trial and error is that I need to be conscious of my actions and my words always. Even then, there will be some who will take offense at something I have said or done when the intent was never to harm in any way. Sometimes people perceive things in a way that is unique to their own sensitivities, and thus paint others actions and words with a broad brush that makes everything "offensive". One need only be the only male in a contemporary feminism class to experience that trip first hand!

So how can we be respectful and yet maintain our own personal flavor or style? The only thing I can say is that what has worked for me is mindfulness. When we are mindful of those around us we naturally don't want to offend or to hurt them. So we can then communicate more clearly and delicately while maintaining our own sense of self, our own sense of humor, our own sense of flare. After a while, when we get to know one another even better, we can relax a little and show other aspects of ourselves through our communication styles.

And let's face it, the more intimate a relationship is, the more colorful the communication will get over time. The main thing is to remember that we care about each other. When we accidentally hurt someone's feelings we need to acknowledge it, apologize, and find a way to make amends that will be meaningful to the person who was hurt. If, after all that, the person is still unwilling to forgive us, then it is their problem, not ours. At the same time, I have had the experience of having someone (more than one person actually) do and say some very hurtful things, but then when they apologize there is always a "but" included, which is followed by a barrage of excuses and accusations. This is not an apology. It does not come from the heart, and it is not worth the time of day. Those who have done this habitually quickly find themselves outside of my circle of trust. That is my nice way of saying I kick them out of my life. So we need to be very conscious of how we apologize and make sure we follow through with the amends part.

Now here I have to also mention that there is a particular "philosophy" (shall we say) about forgiveness that forces people to feel guilty if they don't immediately forgive the offender, whether or not the offender has actually owned up to the ill doing, apologized for it, or made amends. I think we all know of which philosophy I write. All I can say in response to that is....what the heck would then motivate the offender to improve his or her behavior if there are no consequences whatsoever???? Turning the other cheek does not motivate change in them. It only sets us up to be kicked in the teeth from yet another angle.

When we make someone walk through the three "A's" of forgiveness (acknowledgement, apology and amends) we help them to grow emotionally into better people. We actually do them a favor by not doing them the wrong favor of forgiving them without the three A's being fulfilled. This will then also be a demonstration of deep respect and caring for the person who has offended, because we are not letting them off the hook. What we are saying to them is that they are important enough to us that we are willing to walk through this struggle with them. And the amends does not have to be elaborate in nature. It can simply be the promise kept that this sort of behavior will not happen again. It can be as easy as "my kitchen floor needs washing....you do that for me today and we are squared away." Whatever it is that would be something meaningful in some way to the offendee is the best way. If we, as the offender, don't know what that would be, then ask. Even if they need to think about it, they will at least know that we care enough to want to do the work. And once the work is done, no grudges can be held and we can go on with the relationship free and clear of all the clutter, but enriched by the experience.

Blessed Be

Trent