The Farm Where I Grew Up

Sometimes going on a journey to the past is painful, sometimes joyful and sometimes shocking. Mine was a little bit of all of that. Last weekend I went to where I grew up. The purpose of the journey was that I was asked to do the Internment ceremony for my sister who died last year. But I also wanted to show my niece the place where I grew up and where she spent the first 2 years of her life. The farm was bought when my father retired and was never lived in since then. That would be almost 25 years ago. Now what was once a beautiful big house is a hollowed out shell that is so run down we almost expected the gale wind to blow it over.

Lots of memories came flooding back to me. Happy family gatherings, the farm kitchen table with all the farm hands sitting around it at harvest, and some of the not so fun memories of physical and emotional abuse I experienced at the hands of my father and older brother. I was amazed at how large the evergreen trees that I planted when I was a child had become! But as we made our way back to the car, which we parked in the second driveway and walked in from, I couldn't help but feel as hollow and empty as the house and the old barn that was almost falling over. This is a phase of my life that is completely over. I let the memories go, good and bad, and allow them to blow away with the wind of that day.

I am also amazed and proud of the people that we have become since then. By this I am referring to both myself and my niece. We have, despite some of the abuse and neglect that we experienced in our early lives, become strong and dynamic individuals who are creative and intelligent and full of promise. This can be taken away by no one. This is the medicine we will pass down to our children so that they, too, will become strong and amazing individuals. It really doesn't matter where we grew up, or who brought us up. What matters is what we do with the experiences and how we transmute the negatives into powerful medicines with which we can walk through the rest of our lives.

Blessed Be
Trent
www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn
www.deerhornshamanic.com

Reflections

It is always important to remember that throughout our lives we will find many people, some of whom we like and some of whom we do not, who are all reflections of ourselves.  We get all caught up in the human drama of who we like and who we don't and why and so on and so on.  The thing is we all need love.  Sometimes those that we dislike the most are giving us our largest lessons, even when we least expect it.

So the next time we find ourselves saying out loud or in our heads things like "I can't stand that guy" or "I just hate that person's energy" or some such thing, let's take a time out and look at what that person is reflecting back to us.  Perhaps we are also just a little bit like that one. Maybe, even though we don't want to admit it, we are sometimes as dark or devious for different reasons.  And it just may be that this person is here to help us acknowledge just how far we have come from the antics that this person is still trapped in.

Blessed Be
Trent
http://www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn
www.deerhornshamanic.com

Patchwork Quilt

The Prairies are quite beautiful from up in an airplane.  When we went to Montreal two weekends ago, it was the very first time in all my years that I had ever flown in an airplane.  I travel a lot by land and water, but not by air unless you count astral projection and bi-location.  Those two aspects are a lot faster.  It is much like the blink of an eye and poof you are there.  There is also no turbulance! This airplane stuff seemed to take forever to get from point A to point B.  Good thing that they have movies and such to watch.
Now and then I would look out the window and see a scene like this one.  I couldn't help but snap a photo because most of the trip was either covered in clouds or above the clouds and there isn't much to see at those times.  I love looking at the earth from high up.  It does make me wonder though how significant we really are in the eyes of Spirit?
From way up there I could not seem to even grasp a hint of concern for whatever was going on below.  Perhaps that is just my humanness in action.  But then I thought to myself, "If I don't care about what goes on down there, then how does Spirit manage to do so?"  Imagine seeing all the goings on from up on a star somewhere or from a whole other dimension!  Why should Spirit even give a rat's ass?
I decided that Spirit has much more conscious awareness than do I.  This perspective beats the heck out of the alternative, which is that we are just arrogant enough to even consider that Spirit has the time of day for us.

Blessed Be
Trent
http://youtube.com/trentdeerhorn
www.deerhornshamanic.com

That's Just the Beginning!

I think my favorite part of my weekend trip to Montreal last weekend was watching the children around the fountain at the Desjardins Shopping Centre. You see, the fountain had several different patterns to the water flow. In this photo it is doing what I call the "Eight Sisters" pattern. But right after this pattern there would be a shot of water that would reach about three stories up in the middle. This would be immediately followed by a second shot that would go six stories up and almost touch the inside of the domed skylight! It was thrilling to watch as an adult, but the most fun was seeing the reactions of the children watching it. They would squeal and dance and jump for joy when it shot up! What fun. I sat and had my morning coffee in a cafe that was open to the Centre and laughed out loud at some of the reactions in the children. Some of the adults were hardened to such delights. One little girl's grandma was insisting that they didn't have time to watch any longer and, much to my delight, the girl was able to convince her to sit down on a bench and wait for one more gusher shot. It was quite the entertainment.

Blessed Be
Trent
www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn
www.deerhornshamanic.com

The Heart of the Matter

Okay, first off I would like to say "You're welcome, ladies!" Then, for those who are of a different persuasion, I would like to say, "You're welcome, gentlemen!" And now that that is over with, the reason that I chose this photo is obvious...isn't it? It is a photo of the area of the heart!

In life there are many challenges that come up here and there. It is important when that happens to get out of our heads, which are usually filled with fear and self-doubt, and stay in our hearts. The most amazing decisions can then be made when one truly comes from the heart. When these decisions are a matter of life or death we sometimes head straight to the head. Instead, these are exactly the moments when we need to turn to the heart. There is no wrong decision when it comes from the heart centre.

Sometimes we have to also trust, which is a heart issue itself. We need to trust ourselves and our decisions and we sometimes need to trust others. We place our well being in the hands of others every day. We blatantly get behind the wheel of a car and drive the streets that are filled with other drivers. We have to be conscious of what is going on around us, but to a certain degree we also need to have a trust, if not in the other drivers then at least in the process of driving. Medically we can be met by challenges that force us to trust our health care providers and the process that our bodies need to go through in order to survive and be well. Recently a friend of mine went through a surgery that was extremely needed for his well being. Then there were some post surgery complications that hospitalized him again. He was very trusting in the process, even though the rest of us were quite concerned. As it turns out, everything is alright and he is back home. He has inspired me to once again believe in myself and my decisions and to trust in the flow of the universe. Thank you, buddy! You ROCK!

Blessed Be
Trent
www.deerhornshamanic.com
www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn

Music to My Ears

My daughter plays guitar. She plays it extremely well. Since her mom and I separated I have not had opportunity to hear her play that much, as she practices at home and usually doesn't bring her guitar with her when she comes to visit. She has performed for us at Christmas and such, but usually I only get to hear her play at the Performer's Club that she participates in. So it was quite the thrill when she brought her guitar to her last visit and practiced a song.

I have always loved guitar music. This surprises me as my father was the one who played guitar in my family and, as most of you know, our relationship sucked. But the sound of really good guitar playing has always soothed me. It's not the strumming and chords and stuff that does it. Anyone can do that. It's the picking of a soft and gentle piece of music that makes my heart want to sing with joy. I am so glad that my daughter has found that she enjoys playing it. Hopefully this will be something that I get to hear now and then for the rest of my life.

Blessed Be
Trent
www.deerhornshamanic.com
www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn

Clean it Up!

From the time my daughters were very young, they have always been taught that if you make a mess you clean it up and don't expect someone else to do it for you or that the mess will simply magically disappear if you ignore it.  I am appalled that anyone should have such a grand sense of entitlement in this day and age that they don't take responsibility for their messes. 

Sometimes this comes in the form of people who do idiotic things like flicking their used cigarette butts out the car window as they drive down the street. Cars are built with ashtrays for a reason.  Do they care that they can start a fire or that birds and animals can choke on the foam filter when they eat them?  No.  They just flick away and have no concern for the environment or for anyone else other than their miopic selves.

Also common are those who don't take responsibility for the messes they create within relationships.  The broom and dustpan are right there, waiting to be used, and there they sit because someone thinks he or she is either too right or not skilled enough to use the tools presented!  Either one is a cop out.  There is never anything wrong with admitting that we made a mistake or even admitting that we are still learning to use the tools at hand.  Those around us will be quite patient with us if we simply admit to our inexperience and make efforts to clean it up.

So think about your life, your habits and your relationships.  Are there any areas that need a good spring cleaning?  If so, attend to it.  You will not be sorry.

Blessed Be
Trent
www.deerhornshamanic.com