National Treasury

I know that sometimes products need to be child proof in order to be safe. I know that there are some really mean and horribly sadistic people out there who will sometimes try to poison food products. But when breaking into my favorite chocolates during the Christmas season, which only lasts so long, becomes like breaking into the Grand National Treasury then something's gotta give!

I don't consider myself addicted to chocolate. In fact, I can easily go even for months without chocolate. I usually do not binge on it either. But this particular chocolate is, as advertised, a gift from the Gods! I know that I can only have 2-3 of the nuggets if I don't want a headache afterwards. So I go easy on it. After my first I usually wait at least 5 seconds before I have the second and then I always wait a minimum of 2.3 seconds before I have the third. After all, it is important to each chocolate respectfully and responsibly.

So you can imagine my, shall I say "frustration" (insert nervous twitch here), when yesterday it took me 20 minutes just to break into the plastic vault that they arrived in! I used a knife to break the seal, which was not functioning like a properly designed seal should in that the tag that you pull broke upon the first tug, and then I used scissors to try to cut along the edge of the lip of the container, then I twisted and tugged and tried different angles and even different ways to hold my mouth! Just at the point where I was about to pull out my sledge hammer and make chocolate pudding....POP! The lid came off! There were chocolate nuggets all over the kitchen as they spewed from the container. One even landed in the cat food dish! Did that stop me? No way! I worked hard for that prize and I was not about to let the frickin' cat have it! There is, in our house the seven second rule. If it hits the floor and within seven seconds it is picked up it can be eaten. Well, they all hit the floor at some point during this escapade, so.....

Honest.....I'm not addicted! I AM NOT! In fact, there are at least 5 left! How dare you ask me how big a
container it was! What business is that of yours? It is not relevant! Okay, fine, enough with the third degree! There were somewhere between 5 and 24. No! I did not eat them all! I think some rolled under the fridge! Honest....see? There's one under there! If you get right down on the floor and close the eye that is not on the floor and use a flashlight....oh. A dust bunny you say? Well.....THE DUST BUNNY ATE IT!


Blessed Be
Trent
http://www.youtube.com/trentdeerhorn
www.deerhornshamanic.com

Coffee

I remember singing a song in choir competition when I was in about grade 2 or 3. The song went: C-O-F-F-E-E, coffee is not for me! And then a bunch of other stuff about how bad coffee is for you. I was so cute, according to my mom and sister. I will have to believe them, because they would never lie to me, right? RIGHT??

Now I look back on this and find it funny, considering that I am definitely a coffee drinker. It is not that I live on coffee. But I certainly don't think I can live well without it. I like to have one cup in the morning (sometimes 2 if I have had a rough night). That's it. None of this "must have my pot of jet fuel" stuff. With how energetic I am, jet fuel must be kept at a moderate level.

I find that coffee has some medicinal effects for me. Beyond keeping me alert and happy, it helps my digestive system. Too much, like too much of any good thing, can give me some liver problems. So I go about it very carefully. It is the only thing that I use on a daily basis (and some days I don't) that could possibly be considered "harmful" in any way. But because I use it in a gentle way, it doesn't have the negative effects that it might for the hardened addict.

Ever since I was a child I have enjoyed the smell of brewed coffee. When I was 13 I came downstairs one morning, poured myself a bowl of coffee, added cream and sugar, and dipped fresh baked bread into it. It was delicious!! My mother almost had a fit. Not because I was drinking (or in this case, eating) coffee, but because this is what her father, whom I had never met because he died before I was born, used to do every morning! Some things just get genetically imprinted, I'd say. And that kind of imprinting is just plain fun!

Blessed Be

Trent
www.deerhornshamanic.com